Get the Grrs Out
By Louison Nielman
Anger in children is often noisy and challenging. Since their brains are still developing, they can’t yet control their emotions, so they resort to more primal reactions such as screaming, kicking, and throwing tantrums. However, kids can learn how to restore their sense of calm—by describing their anger, measuring it, and finding their own ways of expressing it. Anger often masks unmet needs, so encouraging your child to talk about it can help you find solutions together. When your child feels listened to and understood, their relationship to you becomes more harmonious. This is especially significant because children can sometimes blame themselves for getting angry and might even be afraid of no longer being loved. Making space for our emotions destigmatizes them and allows us and others to better understand these feelings. The reverse—blocking difficult emotions—comes at a high price, ultimately harming our well-being. Here is an activity from my book, The Mindful Kids Activity Book: 60 Playful Projects, Games, and Exercises to Make Friends with Your Feelings (Bala Kids, 2021) that will help children discover a technique for, first, expressing anger in a healthy way and, second, ultimately returning to a calm state.
Reprinted from The Mindful Kids Activity Book: 60 Playful Projects, Games, and Exercises to Make Friends with Your Feelings (Bala Kids, 2021) with permission from Bala Kids, an imprint of Shambhala, shambhala.com/bala-kids.
Louison Nielman is a clinical psychologist who specializes in counseling children and teens. She is an advocate for therapeutic forms of mediation, such as storytelling, puppetry, and playful relaxation therapy.
Anger in children is often noisy and challenging. Since their brains are still developing, they can’t yet control their emotions, so they resort to more primal reactions such as screaming, kicking, and throwing tantrums. However, kids can learn how to restore their sense of calm—by describing their anger, measuring it, and finding their own ways of expressing it. Anger often masks unmet needs, so encouraging your child to talk about it can help you find solutions together. When your child feels listened to and understood, their relationship to you becomes more harmonious. This is especially significant because children can sometimes blame themselves for getting angry and might even be afraid of no longer being loved. Making space for our emotions destigmatizes them and allows us and others to better understand these feelings. The reverse—blocking difficult emotions—comes at a high price, ultimately harming our well-being. Here is an activity from my book, The Mindful Kids Activity Book: 60 Playful Projects, Games, and Exercises to Make Friends with Your Feelings (Bala Kids, 2021) that will help children discover a technique for, first, expressing anger in a healthy way and, second, ultimately returning to a calm state.
Reprinted from The Mindful Kids Activity Book: 60 Playful Projects, Games, and Exercises to Make Friends with Your Feelings (Bala Kids, 2021) with permission from Bala Kids, an imprint of Shambhala, shambhala.com/bala-kids.
Louison Nielman is a clinical psychologist who specializes in counseling children and teens. She is an advocate for therapeutic forms of mediation, such as storytelling, puppetry, and playful relaxation therapy.
